good golly gullet

So I went in to see my rheumatologist this morning for my monthly check-up. He's a cool cat, in great shape and we get along just fine. I worry he will be retiring too soon for my liking - instead he is headed to Spain for 8 months, to study ultrasound methods, in Spanish no less. He's a go-getter. I like that about him.

We go over the basics: no pregnancy on my meds, flu/cold season, and the fact that we basically have maxed out the options up to the more drastic, in-clinic IV med stuff. I know this and nod. We cover the GI doctor's newest diagnosis (yes, the biopsy was positive): eosinophilic esophagitis and the treatment. (I am have an inhaler that I don't *puff* but rather swallow, delivering the steroid to the esophagus. I am sticking closely to a soft food diet.)

I ask tons of questions. I want to know what I can do to improve my case, stay healthy. And he basically says this new condition probably is from my autoimmune disease and there's not much I can do about it. This just ticks me off. Stupid autoimmune disease.

Like I said, this is a good doctor. He encourages me to workout, lose weight, be brave and strong. But I just can't help but think I can do more.

If the freight train is coming, and I can't stop it, fine. But I plan on wriggling my way off the track - maybe it will just lob off a toe.

Clearly I am grumpy and out of sorts. I need a good night's sleep and a plan.

Man, I'm stubborn.